A Valentine’s Question


On this day that is all about love and relationships, I want to ask Christian husbands a question. Do you know how your wives are doing spiritually? Before you jump the gun, I’m asking if you know how she’s doing and not if you think you know because you have assumed how she’s doing. Has she told you recently how her walk with the Lord is going or, more to the point, have you asked?

In a culture with a growing fascination with the insignificant and mundane, even conversations among believers has so centered on the likes of sports, work, and movies that turning the focus to spiritual matters can be awkward and difficult. In God’s design, the family is the foundational building block of society, and as the family goes, so goes the church, culture, and so on.

If you are a believing husband married to a believing wife, you would both agree that Jesus Christ is the most important person in your universe. You strive to make Him more important than even each other. With that being the case, our conversations with our spouses should be saturated with the spiritual. And I’m not talking about merely theology or general doctrinal topics (though both are highly beneficial), but deep, personal, Valentines-ish spiritual conversations that divulge how you are both doing. This not only makes the focus of your relationship that which it ought to be but also makes your spouse who he or she is supposed to be, namely your primary disciple, discipler, accountability, encourager, and confronter of sin.

I want my kids to grow up in a  household in which we model spiritual conversations as the norm, but, more importantly, I want my life and words to prioritize that which is the most significant part of my life (God) with those who are the most significant part of this life (my family) and thereby being the husband, father, leader, and shepherd the Scriptures call me to be. The beautiful simplicity of all of this is that it begins with a simple question.

So, along with all the sugary treats, longing gazes, flowers, and romance of this special day, make it all the more special by looking your wife in the eyes and asking, “How are you doing spiritually?”


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s